YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY ASSASSINATIONS MAKE AN ASS ASS OF I AND NATIONS
J. J. W. Mezun ☆ Season 6 ☆ 2021 November 1
A young but haggard bespectacled woman with a red ponytail named AUTUMN SPRINGER sits crosslegged on the couch, leaning in with full attention on her laptop on the tea table in front o' her. 'Side her is a cute li'l skeleton in a plum-colored robe named EDGAR WINTERS.
Only a second passes 'fore they hear a doorbell. Autumn looks up, only to see Edgar already getting up & heading for the door. She turns her head back down to the laptop.
CLOSE UP to Autumn, still staring seriously @ her laptop. Offscreen there's a sound o' a door opening, causing Autumn to glance up.
Hell -- ¡AHHH!
Autumn's eyes bulge & she jumps up onto the couch as she hears sharp burning sounds from offscreen & dives o'er the back o' the couch in 1 swift motion.
CHANGE ANGLE to 'hind couch with Autumn crouched tightly to it, looking offscreen.
( Thinking )
¡Thank Chamsby for preparing me for true threats!
She scuttles back as the couch begins to gradually glow red, holding 1 hand in her jacket pocket. She pulls out a gray ball, hesitates shakily for just 1 second with the other arm held close to her face & her eyes wincing, & then tosses it onto the ground, & then stands & flees as the room fills with gray smoke.
CAMERA pulls out to show Autumn storming in the direction opposite the front door, stopping @ a door. She doesn't wait a second before yanking open the door.
CHANGE ANGLE to other side o' door, in a lab.
¿Autumn, what's wrong?
Autumn slams the door & presses her back gainst it as a woman in a green jacket & baby blue ski cap named DAWN SUMMERS walks in from offscreen.
¡No time for sitcom talk!
¡Get what offensive chemicals you have -- fast!
¿But what 'bout Edgar?
¡NO TIME! ¡GO!
CHANGE ANGLE to closet. Dawn dashes toward it from offscreen, opens it, & pulls out bottles.
( Looks back. )
¿Can you a'least tell me what this thre -- ¡O shit!
Autumn runs 'way from door now beginning to glow red, toward Dawn. She grabs Dawn, reaches into her pocket, & pulls out 'nother smoke bomb.
Be ready to start running.
Autumn throws down the smoke bomb just as the door crumbles into ashes, & then dashes forward holding onto Dawn with 1 hand while the other arm covers her face. But as she rushes for the door, she bumps into the Android still guarding the doorway. Before she can say or do anything else, the Android wraps its hand round Autumn's throat, squeezing her tightly, causing her eyes to bulge & her face to turn blue.
Since Dawn is still 'hind Autumn, the Android can't reach her. She jumps back just 'fore the Android shoots an eye laser toward her. She digs thru her jacket pockets for the 1st vial her hands find.
Well, here goes null...
She takes 1 step forward & splashes it @ the Android's arm just as its eyes begin to glow red. Sparks begin to surround it & its hand stiffly releases Autumn's throat, causing her to fall back with churtling sounds. CAMERA edges closer in as her face gradually regaining its color. Dawn rushes for her from offscreen & grabs her.
That doesn't give us too much time: that potion'll
just keep him stunned for -- fuck.
Dawn yanks Autumn back just before a laser beam strikes the linoleum, leaving a black spot. Dawn pulls Autumn 'long with her as Autumn jumps back to her feet & follows.
CAMERA changes to living room with Autumn & Dawn running for front door.
Keep looking forward; I'll watch 'hind us.
¿But what 'bout Edgar? ¿Where is--?
Not right now.
Just after saying that, Autumn shoves herself & Dawn to the side as 'nother beam shoots past them. But Autumn doesn't push fast 'nough: her arm is hit with the laser, causing her to shout out in agony. Shreds o' fabric shed like feathers from her sleeve, leaving big boiling red bubbling skin while her arm hangs loosely to the side.
¡My God! ¡Are you all right there, Autumn?
CAMERA changes to outside their apartment. Autumn shoves Dawn out the front door with her good arm, & then slams the door back closed with that same elbow just 'fore clambering full 'speed downstairs 'long with Dawn.
AUTUMN & DAWN run down the sidewalk, Autumn yanking Dawn with her. Both keep turning their heads 'hind & 'front o' them.
A few minutes pass o' just running, during which the only noise that comes out o' either's mouth are heavy breaths. Then Dawn looks 'head @ Autumn:
Autumn: ¿What happened to Edgar, tho?
about, "Not now", do you not understand?
Dawn looks down morosely. A few steps later, Autumn stops Dawn with a hand before a tree & then crouches down.
Climb on my back.
Dawn does so. Autumn returns to her feet & begins climbing the tree.
CAMERA moves to branch much higher up, partly covered by leaves. Thru holes in the leaves you can barely see Autumn & Dawn reach the branch from the bottom o' the screen & stop. Dawn slides off Autumn's shoulders onto the branch. Autumn grabs Dawn's hand.
( Giggles. )
( Whispers. )
Have feet prepared to flee the frame I yank you.
Autumn & Dawn stare downward for 'bout half a minute. Finally, Autumn's eyes dilate.
CHANGE ANGLE to o'er Autumn & Dawn's shoulder. A few seconds later, the Android walks into view. Autumn's grip on Dawn's hand tightens. The Android trudges up to the tree & stops, staring straight up @ Autumn & Dawn. As it stands there, a leaf drifts down.
CHANGE ANGLE to the Android's level. It slowly cranes arm back & then it slings forward, rapidily chopping the tree.
CHANGE ANGLE to Autumn & Dawn up in the canopy with a roof on the right edge o' the camera. Autumn yanks Dawn toward the roof, only for the branch to break under them, causing them to fall, ending with a ¡BOOM! sound from below.
CHANGE ANGLE to the ground, inside a thin passage 'tween 2 buildings covered by the tree. Dawn's just rolling off Autumn's back while Autumn's on her knees. Autumn rolls onto her back with eyes bulging & hands grasping the grassy dirt.
( Mutters. )
Shit, shit, shit...
Dawn rises to her feet & grasps Autumn, eyes shifting 'tween her & the tree still being throttled by the Android’s karate chops.
¿Are you OK?
My legs are broken. Fuck...
( Looks up @ Dawn. )
You'll have to drag me 'way. We need to hurry.
¿You sure it won't hurt -- ?
( Trying to push herself backward with her hands. )
Hurt's preferable to death --
A LOUD CREAKING NOISE comes from the tree & it starts to bend toward them.
¡come on! & don't slow down @ all.
( Takes a deep breath. )
Dawn bends down & Autumn wraps her arms round Dawn's neck. Dawn rises & lifts Autumn's legs into her arms. Then she starts running forward.
( Looking back. )
You keep your eyes ahead & I'll watch backward.
¿You sure this isn't hurting?
Just keep going.
If we don't keep ahead o' that monstrosity,
we won't have heads left, & in trade we'll've won
a whole life's worth o' hurting to fulfill us.
CAMERA looks on different part o' Boskeopoleon streets. Dawn still jogging while carrying Autumn down sidewalk.
( Panting. )
I think we lost it.
( Looks forward. )
'K, you can slow down;
but don't completely stop. I need to think
o' where we should go next -- O.
( Points hand to something offscreen. )
Dawn's eyes follow Autumn's arm & she gets a confused look on her face.
You're not thinking --
We don't have any choice:
I can’t just leave myself to die, as much
as our philosophies in that regard
would be reversed @ any other time;
I have a serial killer that must be killed.
¿Couldn't I just take you to a hospital?
I'm sure there's 1 nearby.
That'd be disastrous.
¿What? ¿We just knock & they'll just toss a wheelchair
outside to us in but a minute's move
with waves & thank you come agains?
¿Or will they force me down into a bed? --
A coffin bed laid out for all o' us,
for in that time the killer'll track us down
& murder anyone who dares to murder
their terminal condition to murder me.
( Looks back @ Autumn. )
¿How do you know for sure it's after you?
¿& how d'you know that it'd be able to find you?
( Urgently. )
Talk while we work.
CAMERA changes to park bench where an OL' MAN sits on wheelchair, asleep. Dawn stops before him, a disturbed look on her face.
( Whispers. )
You'll likely have to set me on the bench
'fore you can lift him. Set me on the far end
so I'm not blocking you from moving him.
( Whispers. )
I don't know if I can do this...
¿You know how life-threatening it could be
to strand him here?
( Whispering mo' urgently. )
¡We don't have a choice!
It's his life vs. potentially hundreds +.
We can't let this thing keep wandering round,
Killing anything between... ¡what it pleases!
( Impatient. )
No time for small talk. Do the deed & just...
call 404 for him. They should help him.
O, good idea.
Dawn slides Autumn onto the bench, who grips onto the arm o' the bench & looks round, a look o' panic on her face.
CAMERA CLOSES IN on Dawn pausing before the Ol' Man with fear on her face. She reaches forward & unclasps him from the wheelchair, & then gently lifts him off. The Ol' Man rustles & murmurs @ 1 point, but quickly falls back to sleep afterward. Dawn sets the Ol' Man onto the bench, & then lifts Autumn & sets her into the wheelchair & starts driving her 'way with 1 hand while the other reaches into her jacket pocket & pulls out a cellphone.
Hello there. ¿404? Apologies:
I haven't much time to talk. I just saw
some looter steal a crippled ol' man's wheelchair,
& now he's stranded on a bench alone
in Peanut Park. I truly wish to help,
but I am late for a family crisis myself.
Dawn puts phone in her pocket & puts both hands on the wheelchair.
We need to find a bus that'll take us somewhere
far, far away. ¿Isn't there a lightrail near us
that travels all the way west to the Boardwalk?
Yeah, I can find the nearest bus stop.
Dawn pulls out cellphone & begins fiddling with it.
You still ne'er told me how you figured out
that this peculiar killer's after you
& your particulars, & how you know
no matter where your feet
-- if they could walk auton'mously, o'course --
carry you 'way,that this mad dog will sniff them to their source.¿You recognize him?
No, but I'll know once we get clear across the city.
There should be a bus stop super close --
only a few blocks down, in fact.
Good. If we're lucky, our bloodthirsty friendwon't have the speed to catch us 'fore the bus comes.
Dawn pushes Autumn onto rail station, where a bunch of other people are standing.
( Whispers near Autumn's ear. )
& you still haven't enlightened me on your plan
to stop this stalker 'fore he locks in stocks
our own beanstalks & chops short our last stock.
( Sticks tongue out & makes chopping motion. )
That's 'cause I still haven't taken stock o' it,
keeping my mind obsessed on keeping 'live.
Now I'm just doing research. Sorry, Dawn,
I had to drag you into this.
O, it's no problem. Quite exhilarating, truly.
'Sides, you're the one punished with broken legs.
¿How are you feeling, by the way?
Impatient to get this over with.
You know I'm no good doctor when my patients
get sick o' their impatience.
Well, I agree with your 1st 3.5 feet.
A train stops before them, opens its doors, & slowly lets out a ramp. Dawn pushes Autumn on & squeezes them into a crowd o' people. Dawn stops them near the door, only for Autumn to point farther in.
Bring me o'er that way, please. I want to watch
outside that window, if we can.
( Confused. )
Dawn pushes Autumn farther in.
Keep going till I tell you, stop, please.
( Laughs. )
Don't tell me you're transforming into Monk now.
Dawn pushes Autumn toward a window by BUS RIDER dressed like a cowboy, with a 10-gallon hat, leather vest, guns in leather holsters, & leather boots.
All right... & stop.
Dawn lightly bumps into Bus Rider.
Oops. Sorry, Sir.
( Tips hat. )
No problem t'all, Madame.
I like your coat. ¿You usually dress like that
or are you on your way to some rad party?
( Laughs. )
You're not all geared up for a bank heist, ¿are ye?
'Fraid not, Madame.
Hey, ¿have your ears been lassoed by the string
about a thief who robbed Syrup bank
some years ago?
Dawn's eyes flicked back & forth 'tween the Bus Rider & Autumn. Autumn stares @ Dawn with wide eyes that'd seem like deep curiosity to others, but to Dawn was a message to tell her to shut her trap.
Yeah. Prob'ly just some stupidly clever
or lucky punk, tho. That or some kinda
covered-up inside job. That said, I doubt
'twas who a bunch o' rumors said it was.
¿What do the rumors say?
O, that 'twas some
millennial woman wearing glasses
or something -- don't remember anymo'.
Been years since I read these ridiculous rumors.
All I remember was this scrawny woman
looked like some college kid, not a type
o' punk who'd rob a bank. All it is
is rural legends -- just to demonize
you urbanites. ( Laughs ) No offense, Madame,
but I think they give you guys too much credit.
Sex & drugs, maybe; ¿but bank heists? Not hardly.
I s'pose a legend can't entrance the scrapbook
which wasn't weird. You can't care 'bout a legend
that's just a chart key glanced @ every day.
I guess that’s what you certainly could say…
Train slows to a stop @ the station, opens doors, & lowers ramp. People walk out, 'mong them Dawn pushing Autumn still in a wheelchair.
CAMERA focuses on Autumn & Dawn.
I didn't know you had rumors birding 'bout
the winevines all these years.
& I didn't know
that you wore on you such a giant mouth.
O, wait, yes I did.
( Laughs. )
There's no reason to fear: as that guy said,
you're just a college kid who likes to fuck
& get fucked up on drugs.
( Points toward something offscreen. )
Let's pause with backs behind the wall o'er there.
Dawn pushes Autumn toward the wall & turns her round. While Autumn tightly grips the arms o' her wheelchair, Dawn leans back gainst the wall.
¿How are you feeling now?
( Exasperated. )
Same as always.
¿You think the killer'll be able to retrace
our invisible footsteps back to us?
They likely will.
¿Why do you think it's chasing us?
Take a wild guess who's 'hind it.
( Turns to Autumn. )
But he's the mayor. This could get him impeached
if he were caught with hands 'pon the keyboard.
¿You fathom how much damage this... guy's caused?
¿What is it, anyway?
My guess: a robot o' some sort. Who knows
what his e'erlasting cache o' cash has bought.
It shocks me you o' any haven't attempted
to clear his dated caches yet.
I did try.
Ne'er able to do it. People don't keep
their currency close under skin no mo'
-- & I can't blame them: I myself don't, either.
I'd have an aneurysm if I left loose
without a bank to staunch such violent flows
my livelihood that comes with sweat & tears.
Like grocery bags, soon paper'll die extinct,
devoured by plastic like dumbass ducks with necks stuck;
& diamonds, they will die as thief's beloved
when every ring rings up their master's name
& every seller's too chickenshit to sell,
have quite the shining contrast, sold themselves
to economic monarchs, like our noble
patron saint o' serial killers, 'stead
o' the hard jewels themselves, to which they promised
fore'er with which to gild their beating rubies.
Soon it'll be impossible to steal
from anyone when property is only
records attached to man thru legal abstracts
rather than the concrete truly holding up their feet.
I read a sci-fi story 'bout some't like that:
some woman, due to problems paying off
her student debt, lost access to the 'biquitous
computer service that gave people access
to various services, such as her college
or hospitals or renting places &,
lost government protection e'en from thieves
& had to join some huddled homeless refugees.
Or something o' that like.
I hear neither science nor fiction in this tale,
but tedious reality as is
already found today & yesterday
& if I know my fellow flesh creatures
mo' than a Martian, equally hereafter,
in every place.
CAMERA pans up & shows sun moving closer to the horizon & the horizon growing a bit orange.
CAMERA pans back down to Autumn & Dawn, Autumn's heavy-lidded eyes shifting left & right while Dawn’s are focused on her phone. Suddenly Autumn's eyes widen.
Dawn stuffs her phone into her jacket pocket & looks up in alarm. She puts her hand on Autumn's wheelchair handles.
Move me back, but keep me straight.
Dawn begins to do so.
Dawn's eyes dilated as she saw Autumn pull out a gun from under the seat o' her wheelchair. Her eyes wander round her in fear.
¿Where did you get that?
Your cowfolk friend.
CAMERA pans out to show the Android walking toward them from offscreen with a hatchet in its hand. Autumn raises gun, aims it @ the Android, & begins shooting, causing screams to emit from offscreen.
CAMERA aims @ the Android. Bullets hit it, only to bounce off like nothing. It yanks its arm back.
CAMERA aims @ Autumn & Dawn, Dawn still moving them backward & Autumn still shooting, a look o' fear on Dawn's face & a look o' curious confusion on Autumn's. Then a blade flies from offscreen @ Autumn's gun arm, chopping it off & causing it to fly 'way.
( Screams. )
After a short pause, Dawn twists Autumn 'way & starts moving mo' quickly & less straight with her head bowed low. Autumn presses the end o' her chopped-off arm gainst her shirt with a look o’ pain.
¡Wait! ¡Find where the gun's landed!
¡I don't think it worked! ¡Are you OK?
Yes, but I NEED that gun.
Dawn turns her head all o'er, & then stops with a withered look. She drives Autumn as fast as she can toward that direction while Autumn continues to press her bleeding stump into her stomach & hyperventilating, blood already drenching down her T-shirt to her sweats. Then Dawn slows as she nears a blood-splattered arm with a gun right next to it. Dawn grips Autumn's wheelchair mo' tightly.
¡Get me the gun!
¿What 'bout your arm?
Yeah. Sure. I may still want it.
Dawn closes her eyes as she bends down & picks up Autumn's still-bloody gun & hands it toward Autumn. Autumn grabs it & sticks it back under her wheelchair seat. Then Dawn picks up Autumn's arm, cringing e'en mo' deeply @ the feel o' its flesh, & then holds it to Autumn. Autumn awkwardly takes it & sets it on her lap. Then Dawn grabs Autumn's wheelchair & speeds 'way as fast as she can.
¿What now? You can't be all right after that.
Autumn's sucking in & blowing it air with great force.
If you can, please get me, quickly as can
to the nearest bathroom we can find
so I can sterilize this stump & staunch it.
¿D'you have a towel on you?
Here, take my jacket.
Dawn pulls her jacket off, leaving her in a cyan sunshirt, & puts the jacket on Autumn's lap. Autumn presses her stump into it.
( Weakly. )
Sorry 'bout all this.
( In alarm. )
Don't apologize @ all.
I don't see how you can be so calm like this.
¿What would alarm accomplish? -- no offense.
I understand that you're not used to this.
I just so want to get this mission o'er with.
I truly am in panic -- panic 'bout
how to get rid o' this fucking assassin.
I'm guessing you don't have any idea
o' what we can do mo'.
My only notion
is stronger violence.
¿Have you explosives @ your lab?
¿& where would we use these?
Fret not, Dawn: I know the safest place.
Hardly anything can be seen under the dark skies. But if one looks closely, one can see 2 black shadows pass 'mong the black trees & buildings in the deep purple sky. They stop in the middle o' the street, & then 1 o' the shadows lifts up the circular shadow o' a mancover.
CAMERA zooms into the 2 shadows standing there.
( Hushed. )
¿How are you going to get down?
( Deep breath. )
You will just have to drop me down.
¿What other choice do we have? We need to hurry
& prep ourselves before our wolf arrives.
I don't feel comfortable just hurting you so much.
The killer won't leave bones for me to break
if we just wait like praying turkeys -- Wait,
I'm stupid. There's a mo' secure solution:
just lift me off my chair, onto your back,
then drop the wheelchair down, & follow it --
mo' softly, 'course.
( Cheerfully. )
CAMERA zooms out 'gain. All that can be heard is the sound o' rustling, & then the sound o' muffled, echoing clanging metal.
CAMERA switches to looking down manhole o'er the shadows o' Dawn & Autumn as they shrink down into the nadir.
I sure hope no stray ear has clouded by.
How inconvenient if some officer
came down here while we're setting up a bomb.
That is the trick with risk: you can't just nix it
without, too, risking your reward 'long with it.
CAMERA switches to level ground floor. There's a thump as Dawn's feet hit the ground, & then a light flashes on: it's Dawn's flashlight, which now faintly reveals the wheelchair lying on its side a quarter meter nearby & Autumn slung o'er Dawn's shoulder with her right arm, her left nub wrapped in slightly red bandages, hanging limply. Dawn tips the wheelchair back onto its legs & lightly slips Autumn down into it.
Let's set the bomb 'bout 2 meters 'way from the hole & stand 'bout... 8 meters 'way.
I forgot to bring my ruler, so
you'll have to use that souped-up processor
you call a brain to make those measurements.
Dawn began pulling Autumn back with her, step-by-step.
Just tell me when I ought to drop it.
Dawn bends down & lowers a plastic device onto the ground. Then she stands back up & continues pulling Autumn backward.
That's good. Now, turn around & I'll watch 'hind you.
¿Shouldn't you be the one looking ahead
so you can measure setting off the bomb?
We can't be sure the killer won't come @ us
behind the other side, & if that happens
blowing it up will be mo' complicated.
No, you've still got the easy job, don't worry.
CAMERA switches to side view o' the sewer tunnel, looking thru the side wall. Dawn turns Autumn round & then they stand with their backs to each other, holding flashlights up, spreading light in both directions. Time passes in silence.
After a few minutes, loud electric groaning can be heard from 'bove while everything rumbles. Autumn & Dawn both look upward.
Turn me around & pull me back some meters.
Dawn does so.
¿O, what? ¿It's coming from above us? ¿Why?
I told you -- it's a dumb robot: it follows
our x & y position & then realizes
we're on a different z position, so
it drills straight down. It only understands
these 3 letters, thus, it can't spell out
sewers & how they barrack basic space.
Their simple programing can't comprehend
how they must wait matching their z to our z
until they hit an incongruent x & y,
just like a mediocre mind that tries
& fails to figure out a Rubik's cube.
Ne'er have I heard the manner average mortals
use staircases spoken so poetically.
Ask any AI scientist, they'll tell you:
an average human bot's extraordinary.
The tail o' a fat drill pops out from the ceiling. Dawn backs them up a bit farther.
Be ready to pull me back as fast as you can
when I say "go".
The Android breaks thru the ceiling & lands on the ground. After slowly rising to its feet, it walks toward them. While Dawn backs them 'way, Autumn raises her bomb in slow motion. She tosses the bomb forward & then, relatively quickly, picks up the detonator. However, by that point, the Android is smacking the bomb forward.
Autumn presses the button, causing the screen to fill with an orange explosion.
Patient wrapped in bandages like a mummy lies in hospital bed. They begin groaning, & then rise a bit.
From offscreen, Dawn walks up to the bed. The patient turns toward her.
( Slightly muffled by bandages, slightly garbled by drugs & weakness. )
'Twas the... 'twas the bomb, ¿wasn't it?
¿Where's the killer?
Dawn leans closer to Autumn.
( Whispers. )
Utterly decimated. By the way,
the alibi is we were just some dumbass kids
wasting our ripeless time nocturnally
in sewer pipes, where postteen turtles linger,
when we witnessed explosions all around.
We have no idea why... but I said
how I suspected 'twas some evening-late
radioactive rat extermination.
¿What'd they say?
They just said, "OK". As far as I know,
they didn't call the cops -- & I haven't seen any.
Autumn tilts her head toward Dawn.
& you still have the wheelchair, ¿right?
It's like they'll give you a nice, new wheelchair here, my dear.
We're no mo' prey to that other problem,
¿remember? 'Sides, you can't leave now, regardless.
You need to rest. The doctors say you're luckier
than every cat who diets on green mushrooms
you still keep locked inside that shell
you abuse just to feed my lightweight heart,
you naughty rebel teen. I almost puked
looking @ you -- your face, your stomach...
Dawn cringes & shivers.
Reminding me o' my habitual hideousness
won't speed convincing me. I can't rest
till Edgar's back. & I still need that gun.
( Alarmed. )
My plan's the only way to bring back Edgar,
& you'd be happier if you didn't learn
the meat beat 'hind that strategy. I swear
on your porcelain soul that no one else
will be permanently hurt, & nobody'll come
e'en close accomplishing the damage I've achieved.
That doesn't save my shivers.
Reality ne'er has for me, but still
it must be. You can't live with,
you can't without.
¿So Lance has kidnapped Edgar 'gain?
He killed him. & the mo' we parley waste
the mo' Edgar remains remains, & that's
unfair to Edgar, 'specially when he
was just collateral gainst a guiltier debt.
This isn't your fault.
No, it is your fault for delaying things.
a parcel o' your fault for keeping me,
your pet bear you can't bear to recognize
is not a cub no mo', but a vicious animal,
wild with the instinct, the sharp claws for violence,
which own my hands, e’en when against my will.
But 'twould be my fault if I didn't do
my best to press you into helping me,
despite your angel heart, to oil it with
my killer scheme to trade rich blood for poor.
The staff won't let you just leave your bed, besides
You said the same yourself before.
Bright Dawn, you always bang my eyes awake.
¿When will it set on your firm firmament?
The legal system & authority,
as well their general society
consistently has vetoed what we must do
to bring back to normal that which fell too hard,
'cause they don't understand the problem,
& would ne'er trust it -- ¿& why should they?
A thief & flake, what lovely locks for truth.
You way o'er estimate our fellow people
& their supposed sympathy for us.
But luckily we've been doing fine till now
sidewising round their interfering no's,
making this city-state a safer place --
especially for us. Now, quit faffing:
go home & bring my rope --
& maybe some invisible potions, too,
if you have any. 'Course we'll sneak me out.
I promise on my heart, although it’s black,
I’ll finally relax when Edgar’s back.
CAMERA focuses on simple house with high, wild grass & exotic plants. From offscreen, Dawn rolls Autumn toward it.
CAMERA switches to zoomed-in view o' house front. Dawn rolls Autumn up to the front door & knocks. Muffled noises grow from the other side till the door opens, 'hind which is Dysmas Equinox with a cheerful expression.
Hello, young ladies. Not oft I get visitors.
¿What can I do for you?
We are conducting an experiment.
¿Mind if I look @ your computer, please?
( Laughs. )
Well, I can ne'er turn down an experiment.
& from your bandages, you can't either. Please:
Dawn rolls Autumn 'hind Equinox into the house.
Equinox enters, followed by Dawn rolling Autumn.
I have to warn you: I'm not very good with computers.
Dawn, ¿could you move this chair out o' the way, please?
¿Will you need help with using it?
Dawn slides chair far back to the side, rolls Autumn up to the computer, & then presses the front button on the tower, causing it to hum to life.
( mutters )
Hmm... an XP. I'll have to wash my hands
after we're done.
¿So what is the experiment about?
The evolution o' data.
O, ¿in comparison to animals?
I must confess I'm curious why you'd pick
my computer out o' all others, since
I can't imagine that it has much data.
You are a man o' science, 1 o' few
willing to sacrifice themselves for this.
You know those weak-willed, flesh-fetish'd, last-man limits
that hold most people back from better meds
than their false god, base security.
I kind o' do. But I must tell you,
it is no sacrifice @ all.
That's good to hear.
Autumn looks back @ the screen, now showing the desktop, with its familiar exaggerated green hills & pastoral blue cloudy skies, & moves the mouse in circles impatiently as she waits for the icons to load into place. She shakes her head as she moves the pointer toward a blue icon shaped as a lowercase "E".
( mutters )
O, good. I bet it still is version 6, too.
Autumn double clicks the blue icon & pauses as an empty white window loads.
Don't let her sexy youth confuse you, Sir:
Madame here makes a crafty scientist.
( still staring @ loading browser window )
Your falsified ad would work much better if
my recent accident had not forced me into
this mummy cosplay --
( mutters )
O, shit: it's 7. Living on the edge.
When it loads Seamail, showing a list o' emails, she turns to Dawn.
OK, you can start the experiment.
Dawn pulls handcuffs out o' her pocket & snaps them round Equinox's wrists. Then she pulls out tape.
I'm confused. How --
Dawn wraps the tape round his mouth, turning his words into muffled gibberish.
Sorry -- but you need t'learn how not to build
murderous robots for murderous mayors.
Keep watch o' him, please. I'll tell you when I'm done.
( cranes her head toward Autumn )
¿You able to use it well?
¿With this OS? As well as any else, a'least.
CAMERA switches to back wall.
Dawn sits him down gainst the wall, sits next to him, & pulls out a Game Boy.
You'd like this game: it stars creatures as plenty
as Abraham's stars, diverse as rainbows, who
like humans, ne'er hold back their grasp on all
the elements mom-milking earth provides --
her water, fire, ice, electricity;
her leaves, her steel, her rocks, & e'en rare dragons
( as well those extra special essences
as darkness, ghosts, fairies, & e'en psychology ).
& if that doesn't infect your interest 'nough,
these organisms add on extra chessboards
from that same origin as real-life species --
thru evolution, won hard from the struggle
o' steady-slow experience, which our friend,
our wrinkle-faced Autumn should appreciate...
Equinox muffles an incomprehensible response.
I was sexy 'fore, but now I'm wrinkled;
I think I found an inconsistency
in your hypothesis, my doctor.
Learned eyes know wrinkles are immensely sexy.
I 'fess it true: my eyes are not as studious.
Autumn rolls her wheelchair back from the desk.
OK, we're done.
CAMERA pans out.
Autumn swivels her chair round as Dawn rises & puts her hand toward the tape.
Don't free him till after we've finished --
it won't take long. We must make sure he doesn't
trainwreck up our "experiment".
Dawn continues to look @ Equinox with uncertainty, but then rises to her feet & grabs Autumn's wheelchair. She looks @ Equinox 1 last time & shrugs.
Sorry. A life's @ stake here. If you're good
Maybe I'll get you your own copy o'
the game I showed you.
Then she rolls Autumn out.
Dawn rolls Autumn toward door, looking to the sides.
We only have a couple hours to prep:
we must get home to gather needed tools,
& then arrive @ Shermy's Smelters
by 6 PM.
( Whispers. )
¿Do I have time to nab a few chemicals?
This nut must have some frigid stuff.
There's always time left for a little theft.
CAMERA looking down on faintly-lit metal walkway. Lance Chamsby stands in the middle with his drama-masked, golden-tuxedoed henchmen standing round 'hind him. Lance is looking down @ his platinum wristwatch.
He better not be late like last time.
The guard just 'side him who goes by the name AGENT PURPLE MOUNTAIN'S MAJESTY points a finger up.
PURPLE M. M.
CAMERA switches to looking o'er Lance's shoulder. From the darkness an e'en blacker shadow moves. Then, out o' the darkness into the dim light, rolls in Autumn, still in her wheelchair, & still with bandages all o'er her left nub o' an arm, her face, & round her stomach. Her good arm hangs o'er the edge o' her wheelchair arm, fingers dug under her seat.
CAMERA focuses on Lance, who scowls.
I thought that dimwit Equinox had said
that he had taken care o' you. ( Smiles. ) Although,
from this refreshing sight, it doesn't seem
that there's much mo' left to take care o'.
I think I better like your new appearance.
It hurts when justice finally turns around
with its swift kick, ¿doesn't it? So,
¿why did you bother crawling your way here?
¿Hoping we'd finish off the job for you?
Typical lazy socialist. But this
for once is labor I will savor doing
for someone else.
CAMERA focuses on Autumn, who shakes in her chair.
( Weakly. )
I cannot hear you...
CAMERA switches to a side view, showing Autumn on the left side & Lance & his henchmen on the right.
Lance scoffs, but then steps forward toward Autumn with bold steps, leaving his henchmen meters 'hind him to stare forward without showing any emotion.
I said, "¿What are you here for?" I hope
you're not deluding yourself that we may
feel guilt for you, for all the trouble you have caused.
CAMERA closes in on Autumn & Lance.
Autumn turns her head up to Lance, looking him directly in the eyes.
No: like you said, I came for justice --
blood for blood.
CAMERA focuses on Autumn. In a swift motion, Autumn pulls a gun out from under her seat, raises it to Lance's level, & begins shooting.
CAMERA focuses on Lance, with his henchmen in the background. Lance has barely any time to react with fear before he's crying out & knocked back a step by bullet after bullet hitting his chest while 'hind him his henchmen throw their arms up & cry out themselves. CAMERA zooms in on Lance as he falls forward onto his chest, a pool o' dark blood spilling out from under him.
CAMERA focuses on Autumn, who wastes no time afterward to return her gun to under her seat, turn, & roll her wheelchair 'way as quickly as she can, back into the darkness.
CAMERA looks down on rooftop with a golden helicopter. Dawn crouches 'hind it, staring down @ her phone.
A few beats later, rolling sounds grow from offscreen. Dawn looks up from her phone & rises just a bit, & then rises all the way to her feet & walks forward as Autumn rolls her wheelchair into view.
¿Figure out a way to get inside?
¿What did you do?
No time to talk: hurry us inside, please.
Dawn makes a quick look round, & then opens the back door closest to them. Autumn rolls up to it, & then Dawn struggles to lift Autumn into the back seat.
( Labored whispering. )
Lance doesn't concern himself too much for those
with disabilities, now, ¿does he?
He gave abundant swell concern for me,
given everything that's happened. Here, I'll climb out
into the back to make it easier.
Autumn unclips herself & with her 1 good arm, drags herself onto the seat, & then o'er the back. Dawn, going much mo' quickly than before, pushes the wheelchair in & o'er the back seat, climbs in herself, & then shuts the door with a clicking sound. There's a bit mo' movement that can only faintly be seen thru shadows.
PURPLE M. M.
Right here, guys.
Purple Mountain's Majesty & the rest o' the henchmen walk into view, carrying Lance's corpse completely wrapped in blankets toward the helicopter. Purple Mountain's Majesty lets go, leaving the others to re-adjust to keep his end up, while he rifles thru his pockets & pulls out a keychain. He pushes a button, making a beep sound, & then opens the door. The other henchmen go inside with the body while Purple Mountain's Majesty walks round the front o' the helicopter to the front door on the other side & goes in. Soon after, there's a click sound, followed by the helicopter's blades gradually beginning to spin.
CAMERA switches to Autumn & Dawn back in cramped, dark area with blanket completely covering them. The twacking o' helicopter blades can be heard from outside, & in the side corner o' view one can see the ends o' windows showing racing small scenery.
CAMERA watches an empty rooftop as the sound o' helicopter blades gradually grows from nothing. A helicopter lands from the top o' the screen, & then lets its blades sputter to a stop. A beat after, Purple Mountain's Majesty comes out, slams the door shut, & strides toward the edge o' the screen with a phone to his face.
PURPLE M. M.
The rest o' the guards come out, still carrying Lance's blanket-covered corpse toward the left side o' the screen.
CAMERA looking down center o' office cramped with filing cabinets, desks, & boxes. None o' the flourescent lights are on: the room is lit faintly by candles. Standing in the back with a phone up to her face is a skeleton named ANNWN in an elaborately cut-up, elaborately layered deep purple gown & straw hat with fake-looking thick strands o' green hair stretching out from 'neath. She's standing next to a big black pot that takes up almost half the room. She puts her phone down as Purple Mountain's Majesty strides in from the bottom o' the screen.
Purple Mountain's Majesty stops next to her while his guards stand round the other side. He rifles thru his jacket & pulls out a handful o' bills, only to stop & look toward the camera 'long with everyone else. Annwn has her arms up. A moment after, Dawn rolls Autumn in from the bottom o' the screen. Autumn's holding a gun & aiming it @ Annwn.
CAMERA focuses on Autumn from the front.
Wait: we have someone else you must revive.
CAMERA focuses on Annwn.
Robbery like this won't feed
healthy prospects tied to thee.
CAMERA pans out to show everyone. Autumn turns her gun to Purple Mountain's Majesty.
Charge it to Chamsby: he broke it, he buys it.
( Faces Purple Mountain's Majesty. )
'Less you prefer paying for mo' revivals.
I can foresee quite a lot you might need.
Everyone pauses, staring @ Purple Mountain's Majesty as he breathes heavily. Finally, he begins riffling thru his tuxedo 'gain.
PURPLE M. M.
( Sighs. )
You guys just love making my job mo' difficult,
As Purple Mountain's Majesty hands the money to Annwn, Autumn turns to Dawn. Dawn steps toward Annwn as she puts her hand in her jacket pocket & pulls out a bottle. After pocketing the money, Annwn turns to Dawn, who holds up the bottle.
These are his ashes.
( Nods. )
Dump them in the pot, my dear;
All the rest is done, no fear.
CAMERA focuses on Dawn & Annwn. Dawn unscrews the bottle & dumps ashes into the pot as Annwn begins stirring a large wooden spoon.
I already drew the lots on
the ingredients we want,
based on Chamsby's henchman's call,
so it won't take long.
Dawn stares down into the pot, eyes widening. She turns back to Autumn.
Autumn, you ought to come & look.
CAMERA pulls back to show Autumn, who looks 'tween Purple Mountain's Majesty & Dawn with suspicion. Dawn's looking into the pot 'gain.
He's growing back into... his body, I guess.
( Looks back. )
Here, let me bring you o'er.
Dawn goes back to Autumn & rolls her toward the pot. Autumn leans upward to see inside, eyes becoming disturbed.
Shit: I forgot to carry clothes for him.
He can wear my jacket.
Dawn begins unzipping her jacket. She laughs as she looks to the side @ Purple Mountain's Majesty.
¿Does that mean Lance is always born again
naked as naturally 1st-born
Purple Mountain's Majesty, who is looking 'way as Dawn undresses, nods silently.
We won't be staying for that, tho.
( Laughs. )
Aww. ( Looks up @ Annwn. ) ¿Is he done yet?
( Laughs. )
As weird as that sounds.
CAMERA focuses on Annwn, who has a look o' consternation on her face.
Errors seem t'occur today,
as bad augurs somedays make
I had warned you ladies, such
Now it has erupted.
Well, just look.
Autumn looks up @ Annwn.
¿You mean 'cause he's a skeleton? I'm sorry
that was sure something we should've said before --
that's what he normally is.
Then he is revived, Madame.
Here you go, Edgar. You can put this on.
Dawn lowers her jacket into the pot. After a short delay, Edgar climbs out. He looks round & stops on Autumn with a look o' horror, & then comes up to her & puts his arms round her.
We can trade words till English is a nub
later, on the way home. Now let us get
the hell from here 'fore hell finds in its deck
mo' fun casino games to poker us bloody,
like virgins 'gain.
Aye, I agree whole-heartedly.
Now, with the same determination you
used to return us back to safety, I'm
determined we must terminate these threats
& you must get @ last some rest.