Read YOU CAN’T HAVE YOUR JUST DESERTS UNTIL YOU FINISH YOUR LIMESTONE SO EAT UP YOU LITTLE PUNK, Intro

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YOU CAN’T HAVE YOUR JUST DESERTS UNTIL YOU FINISH YOUR LIMESTONE SO EAT UP YOU LITTLE PUNK

Moon 1: Rescue Edgar

J. J. W. Mezun ☆ Season 5 ☆ 2017 July 8

Durian Desert. Moon 1: Rescue Edgar.(Fade from white. Autumn still surrounded by sandstorm.)Autumn: “¿Edgar?”.(Sandstorm abates, leaving Autumn in the middle o’ a desert.)(Autumn looks round herself.)Autumn: “¿Edgar?”.Autumn: “¿Where’d he go?”.Autumn: “This desert is just the same empty space for meters; ¿where could he have hid?”.Autumn: “Maybe he’s somehwere in the town up ’head”.Autumn: “’Scuse me, Madame, ¿but would you happen to have seen a skeleton round?”.Woman: “Yes. Look round you: they’re everywhere”.Woman: “I doubt anyone will care if you take 1 for whatever reason”.Autumn: “I meant a live 1”.Woman: “I’ve ne’er seen 1 before;[…]”.Woman: […]but, I have heard rumors o’ live mummies in Peperoncini Pyramid”.Baumaus: “’Scuse me, Madame, for rudely eavesdropping;[…]”.Baumaus: “[…]¿but would you happen to be friends with this live skeleton in question?”.Autumn: “¿What if I am?”.Baumaus: “O, no offense meanut @ all, Madame”.Baumaus: “I wanted to ask ’cause, well, this skeleton’s very nervous & scared,”.Baumaus: “& I couldn't bear to let him be harmed”.Baumaus: “¿By the way, would your name happen to be ‘Autumn Springer’?”.Autumn: “…”.Autumn: “Yes”.Baumaus: “¡Excellent! Then you must be the 1 he’s asking for”.Baumaus: “Please, follow me & I can show you to him”.Autumn: “…”.Autumn: “’K”.(Autumn follows Baumaus through town.)(Baumaus leads Autumn into a sewer room.)Baumaus: (in front o’ doorway.) “You can find him inside”.Autumn: (goes inside.) “Got it”.Baumaus: “Hee hee hee. Sucker”.Autumn: (back out.) “He wasn’t in there”.(Autumn jumps out o’ the way just as Baumaus slashes forward with his sword.)Autumn: “You can’t bear to see Edgar be hurt, but such sentiments clearly don’t extend to me”.Autumn: “¿What is your goal in all o’ this?”.(Autumn dodges ’nother slash by Baumaus.)Autumn: “He’s smart ’nough not to blather on”.Autumn: “I must quickly think o’ a way to dispatch him ’fore 1 o’ those slices fails to miss”.Autumn: (backs into a pipe) “…”.(Autumn leaps o’er ’nother slash by Baumaus.)(Baumaus cuts open the pipe, causing water to spray into his face.)(Baumaus falls offstage while a moon slips out o’ his robe & lands on the ground.)Autumn: (picks up moon.) “Now I only wonder if there was some truth to Edgar being here…”.Autumn: (walks back the way she came.) “Well, since I can’t go past that pipe, I s’pose he’d have to be this way”.Autumn: “Edgar, ¿Can you hear me? ¿Edgar?”.Autumn: “Hmm… Either he’s not here or he’s gagged”.Autumn: (sees Edgar tied & gagged on the other side o’ a pipe.) “O, there you are”.Autumn: “Don’t worry, I’ll save you”.Autumn: “…”.Autumn: “…if I can figure out how to get on the other side o’ that pipe”.
Read YOU CAN’T HAVE YOUR JUST DESERTS UNTIL YOU FINISH YOUR LIMESTONE SO EAT UP YOU LITTLE PUNK, Moon 2: Secret o’ the Oasis